How to Simplify the Holidays

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Want an Old Fashioned Christmas? You’re in the Right Place!

Every year, it seems like the holiday season starts earlier and earlier, doesn’t it? 

One day after Halloween, there’s Christmas music in the stores. By November, the Christmas ads are on TV, reminding us to buy, buy, buy and consume, consume, consume. 

And don’t even get me started on Black Friday, which has turned into a whole week-long event. It’s like there’s no escape! 

By the time December hits, the pressure is on. Suddenly, you’re hearing things like, “There are only 3 Saturdays left before Christmas!” (Who decided that was supposed to make us feel better?!)

And before you know it, you’re rushing to finish your shopping, juggling an ever-growing to-do list, and trying to figure out how to wrap it all up (literally and figuratively) before the big day.

Honestly, I never seem to finish my to-do list until the last minute — anyone else?

 You can almost feel the collective sigh of relief when you’re finally done. Even the checkout clerks seem a little more relaxed when they wish you “Happy Holidays” in late December. (You just know they’re thinking, I can’t wait until January! And honestly, who can blame them? We’re all burnt out from trying to do all the things.)

The Consumerism Trap

It’s so easy to get caught up in the idea that we need to do more and spend more during the holidays. We pile up presents, spend hours decorating, and spend entire days in the kitchen. By the time we sit down for Christmas dinner, we’ve spent more time cooking than actually being with the people we care about. If cooking is a way of being together, that’s one thing! But often I find myself taking on too much.

Years ago, I made the decision to stop participating in this over-the-top, consumption-driven version of Christmas. Instead, I wanted to focus on simplifying the holidays and making them more meaningful for my family. 

It wasn’t an overnight shift, but each year I found ways to cut back on the stress and focus on what really mattered to me. (And spoiler alert: it wasn’t the perfectly wrapped gifts or the Instagram-worthy decorations.)

A Love for Beautiful Things (But Not at Any Cost)

Now, don’t get me wrong — I love beautiful things! I admire neatly displayed appetizers, thoughtfully wrapped gifts, and elegant holiday décor. There’s something magical about it all, for sure. 

But here’s the thing: all those things are just the icing on the cake, not the cake itself. You know what I mean?

If those things bring you joy, by all means, go for it! I mean, I’m all for anything that makes you happy during the holidays.

But if they don’t bring you joy, then guess what? You don’t have to do them. Seriously! 

It’s okay to say no to things that stress you out, even if they seem like “tradition.”

And yet, for some reason, it’s not always that simple, is it? 

Holiday Expectations: A Trap We Can Break Free From

We get caught up in expectations — from society, family, friends, and sometimes even ourselves. We start confusing those expectations with actual needs. 

We’re expected to buy a certain number of presents, to cook certain dishes, to decorate in a particular way. So, we do it, even if we’re not feeling it.

A few years ago, I had an epiphany. I started doing only what I genuinely wanted to do for the holidays. (Let me tell you, it was a game changer.) It was such a relief! 

I gave myself permission to have fewer gifts, a simpler Christmas morning, and way fewer tasks on my to-do list. And guess what? No one cared.

My family (who I adore) didn’t come over for the fancy gifts or elaborate meals — they came for time together. 

The same is probably true for your family. They’re not keeping score of how many lights are on your house or whether you served a five-course dinner. They’re just happy to be with you.

How to Simplify the Holidays (Without Feeling Guilty)

If you’re ready to simplify Christmas, Thanksgiving, or another holiday this year, here are a few tips that have worked for me. I hope they help you, too!

1. Make a Budget (and Stick to It)

I know, I know — budgets aren’t exactly fun, but trust me, they can be a lifesaver during the holidays when you don’t want to go into debt. Every year, I start by creating a budget for gifts, activities, and meals. 

It helps me stay focused and avoid that last-minute panic where I feel like I need to spend more than I can afford. 

Breaking down your budget into categories can also help you see where you might be able to cut back. Do you really need a dozen different appetizers? Maybe one or two favorites will do. 

Or maybe outsource the appetizers to your guests and focus your attention on the main meal…

And when it comes to gifts, having a plan means you’re less likely to overspend or impulse buy. 

2. Simplify Your Decorations

Minimalism is your friend here. We keep our decorations pretty simple — mostly because we don’t have the space or the desire to store a bunch of holiday décor for the other 11 months of the year! 

My favorite decorations? Things I find outside. (Think pinecones, evergreen branches, and pretty stones.) They bring a touch of nature into the house and can go right back outside when we’re done. No clutter, no fuss.

3. Make a Gift List (and Stick to It)

One thing that has simplified my holiday shopping is deciding in advance what I’m going to buy for each person, especially my kids.

I make a list, and then I either buy online or go to the store specifically for that item. No more wandering around, hoping for inspiration! 

I don’t have strict rules for how many gifts I buy, but the kids usually get about three or four presents from me. Then, of course, they end up with more from other family members. 

For extended family, I keep it simple too: one gift per person, and I often like to add something homemade, like chocolate or vanilla extract. 

When it comes to buying gifts for my kids, I try to focus on things that are meaningful, not just what’s popular. One year, I caved and bought the trendy doll that everyone was asking for (my youngest asked for it over and over!).

But in the end, it sat untouched, while the more thoughtful gifts I chose became the favorites. That experience taught me to trust myself when it comes to gift-giving—even if the kids are begging for the latest thing.

I also make stocking stuffers simple by focusing on things that don’t create clutter. That means lots of consumables, which are easier for me as well!

4. Reframe Hosting

In the past, I’ve hosted Christmas, but I quickly learned something about myself: I don’t love hosting. 

 When I do, I keep it low-key by hosting a Christmas brunch instead of a big dinner. (It’s much easier to prepare, and most of it can be done ahead of time. Win-win!) 

But these days, I’ve realized it’s okay to let others take over hosting duties if they enjoy it more. (It’s all about following what feels right for you!) The holidays are about spending time together, not about impressing anyone with your hosting skills.

Update: I actually do enjoy hosting! Once I gave myself a break from the obligation of it, I made space for what I actually wanted to do. I love the gathering and togetherness, as long as I keep the meal simple (learn how I do that here).

5. Schedule Holiday Activities

With all the hustle and bustle, holiday activities tend to get pushed to the side. So, I make it a point to schedule community events, parties, and at-home activities. That way, we don’t miss out on the fun parts of the season, like seeing holiday lights (one of the kids’ favorite things). 

It helps to sit down and think about what activities actually make you happy and fit into your schedule—whether it’s going caroling, baking cookies, or just watching Christmas movies together. Don’t feel like you have to do it all. Just pick the things that matter most to you and your family. 

6. Be Grateful

One of the biggest things that has helped me simplify is refocusing on gratitude. I remind myself what this season truly means to me: togetherness, reflection, and celebrating the things that really matter, not endless consumerism or unnecessary stress.

Gratitude is something I try to model for my kids, too. (It’s easy for the holidays to become all about presents when you’re a kid!) I want them to know that while gifts are nice, what we’re really celebrating is the joy of being together and the magic of the season itself.

One way we practice that kind of gratitude is by slowing down and creating cozy seasonal rituals focused on cultivating hygge. Lighting candles, making herbal tea, and gathering around something warm and nourishing… these are small moments that help us feel grounded and thankful for what we already have.

Learn more about how I do that here: A Permaculture Mama’s Guide to a Hygge Holiday

How Are You Simplifying the Holidays?

I hope these tips help you take a step back, breathe, and enjoy the holidays in a way that feels good to you.

It’s not about doing less for the sake of doing less—it’s about doing what feels right for you and your family. What brings joy? What can you let go of without guilt? 

I’d love to hear how you’re simplifying your holiday season! Let me know in the comments. Are you focusing more on experiences than things? Cutting back on gift-giving? Opting out of hosting this year? Let’s share ideas for making this time of year more joyful and stress-free.